Friday Afternoon Thread........Technicians' Horror Stories
- Thread starter Purple Cat
- Start date
6th form Hooke's Law practical. Pupil hangs the mass hanger with about 8x100g masses on it off his eyelid. Then screams, physics teacher is squeamish and she sends for techs to help him remove it. Eye is ok, he gets banned from doing practicals for a while.
Arrived to start my job at the college to find many partially labelled bottles of stuff, including "dilute acid" hanging around the labs. I take a mil out and put indicator in with the hope of titrating a value out of it. The acid reacts to the indicator by bubbling and hissing. Titrating it showed it to be conc...
Back in...I think 2015 or so, we changed from 3-tier to 2-tier system in mid Suffolk. 4 middle schools were closing, all of whom were supposed to liaise with the 2 high schools about transfer of equipment etc.
One middle school refused to accept they were closing, ignored all communications and deliberately set different work for their students to what we had asked so their transition was particularly fdifficult (bstrds!!!)
One middle school had only very basic science equipment - think, salt, iron filings etc - but were very happy for us to take anything that might be useful (we're still using their iron filings shakers!)
One middle school actually had a technician! He was delighted that I wanted to visit and we transferred the vast majority of the contents of their prep room over to ours. He was only 4 months off retirement so got a particularly good deal out of that closure.
The fourth one had no technician, two very old fashioned classrooms and a prep room in between. The head of science apologised that she wasnn't sure what was there when we visited, but we were welcome to look.
We found The Cupboard From Hell.
It had clearly not been opened for some years. Other technician and I (thank goodness I hadn't gone alone to that one!) unlocked what looked like a standard metal flammables cupboard. We discovered a 2.5l, nearly full bottle of conc. ammonia on the top shelf. The shelf itself was composed largely of rust and looked as if it could go any minute. On the bottom shelf was a labelled bottle of conc. hydrochloric and an bottle of something I suspected to be conc. sulphuric with a label so faded and brown it was almost unreadable.
Other technician and I turned white. Gulped. Locked the cupboard. Backed away slowly. Advised the teacher not to touch or go near it and that we would be sending someoe around ASAP to deal with it!!!
(I don't do phonecalls so I can't remember how any people my colleague called, but I do remember hearing "you found WHAT?!" when she called CLEAPSS for urgent advice!!)
One middle school refused to accept they were closing, ignored all communications and deliberately set different work for their students to what we had asked so their transition was particularly fdifficult (bstrds!!!)
One middle school had only very basic science equipment - think, salt, iron filings etc - but were very happy for us to take anything that might be useful (we're still using their iron filings shakers!)
One middle school actually had a technician! He was delighted that I wanted to visit and we transferred the vast majority of the contents of their prep room over to ours. He was only 4 months off retirement so got a particularly good deal out of that closure.
The fourth one had no technician, two very old fashioned classrooms and a prep room in between. The head of science apologised that she wasnn't sure what was there when we visited, but we were welcome to look.
We found The Cupboard From Hell.
It had clearly not been opened for some years. Other technician and I (thank goodness I hadn't gone alone to that one!) unlocked what looked like a standard metal flammables cupboard. We discovered a 2.5l, nearly full bottle of conc. ammonia on the top shelf. The shelf itself was composed largely of rust and looked as if it could go any minute. On the bottom shelf was a labelled bottle of conc. hydrochloric and an bottle of something I suspected to be conc. sulphuric with a label so faded and brown it was almost unreadable.
Other technician and I turned white. Gulped. Locked the cupboard. Backed away slowly. Advised the teacher not to touch or go near it and that we would be sending someoe around ASAP to deal with it!!!
(I don't do phonecalls so I can't remember how any people my colleague called, but I do remember hearing "you found WHAT?!" when she called CLEAPSS for urgent advice!!)
(For those with access to SSERC, see bulletin 270 for the full story...not my school I hasten to add!)
A multitude of errors:
A multitude of errors:
- Kettle is taken from the staff room for a chemistry experiment.
- Student is accidentally given a mercury thermometer rather than spirit.
- Student breaks thermometer in kettle, and either doesn't realise or keeps quiet.
- Kettle is returned to staff room.
- Teacher finishes cup of tea and notices small beads of mercury in the bottom of the mug.
- All hell breaks loose.
Sounds like one of our chemistry teachers who decided to help himself to chem store one open evening. ( He found key) We came in next day & started clearing up. There was a large conical flask with clear liquid in it, unlabelled. On closer inspection it looked a little 'oily'.
Turned out to be conc sulphuric that he'd got out for reasons known only to himself.
Needless to say key to chem store is taken away or well hidden on open evenings now.
Same teacher has also ; filled room with Lycopodium powder to point where kids are covering faces & breathing through their jackets.
Had kids standing on tables to watch him 'perform', kid fell off & broke ankle.
Set fire to floor, desk,, actually pretty much everything.
Lobbed large pieces of alkali metals into water & burnt ceiling. ( he still does this if he can get hands on key to flammables)
Blew hole in asbestos garage roof with Hydrogen balloons ( ties loads together) we had neighbours calling police on that one thinking it was bomb.
Drank dilute HCL in front of kids.
Broke door down to prep room when we locked it.
Other things too numerous to mention.
Perhaps @Emil Tac could add to these stories!
Purple Cat
It's real Science not Rocket Science
Should never have been a teacher - I'm surprised he didn't get arrested after the 'bomb' incident. But like all of nature's idiots probably got through without a scratch.
And I still think there's more we haven't remembered! How could I forget the dreaded concrete?
When we had refurb it baffled the builders,
Funny how these days all the local DIY places don't sell cement or sand to schools anymore
This is the worst I've seen in this thread (so far).
Not exactly a near miss, but more amusing. At a school I used to work in, the senior tech had an empty in/ full out policy on glue sticks to stop the teachers helping themselves. On a night out one of the physics teachers fessed up that since his wife's school used the same glue sticks, but didn't have a ludicrous policy on their use, he collected her empties and used them to amass a bigger set of glue sticks. Amusement all round everyone but the senior tech who looked less than amused, which of course amused the rest of us further.
I applaud his initiative,
however agree with Senior tech, not ludicrous at all!We spend over £1000 pa on glue sticks & I have had to explain the reason to the bursar before.
Loads end up on floor, in bin or kids pockets.
I don't do empty in/full out out maybe I should
We had a teacher who retired last year who always had at least one roll of magnesium ribbon, a glue stick, board pens and a random bit of locktronics in his lab coat pockets.I applaud his initiative,
We spend over £1000 pa on glue sticks & I have had to explain the reason to the bursar before.
Loads end up on floor, in bin or kids pockets.
I don't do empty in/full out out maybe I should
He's been back a few times this year to do cover, which is great because he's happy to go ahead with planned practicals.
Guess what we aways put in his lab coat pockets
We had a teacher who retired last year who always had at least one roll of magnesium ribbon, a glue stick, board pens and a random bit of locktronics in his lab coat pockets.
He's been back a few times this year to do cover, which is great because he's happy to go ahead with planned practicals.
Guess what we aways put in his lab coat pockets
Mg ribbon is on the Home Office counter terrorism "Secure Your Chemicals" list of things we have to control with extreme prejudice
Can't imagine sneaking it into a cover teachers pocket counts......
Fair point, that did sund a bit dodgy didn't it!!! It's not a case of "sneaking" so much as "5cm length in a pot and it's ALWAYS the first thing he checks for because he expects it". Teacher in question was an absolute stickler for safety when he worked here.
Be fine in there wouldn't it....? Satisfies the criteria at least...:
Do you know where it is, and how much of it there is? - Yes
Is it secure from theft, etc? - Absolutely yes! I mean, would you willingly put your hand in the pocket of a teacher's lab coat?
I certainly wouldn't, you never know what diseases you may catch...... Was he dismissed? I would have a breakdown working with that kind of liability!
At the College, we had a shortage of gluesticks lasting around a term, no matter how many I and the teachers ordered. The following academic year, one of the HoDs became responsible for all of science and I visited her to ensure she was trained in my ways. Guess what was displayed on her windowsills - one hundred gluesticks that had been arriving at her office all the previous year and for which she said she'd had absolutely no use...I applaud his initiative,
We spend over £1000 pa on glue sticks & I have had to explain the reason to the bursar before.
Loads end up on floor, in bin or kids pockets.
I don't do empty in/full out out maybe I should
They moved in with me and lasted about a month...
Dismissed?
He's a nightmare. Always something. @Emil Tac was his tech for 5 years & can attest to that!